// wait //

Do you ever just get that feeling where you don’t want to talk to anybody? you don’t want to smile, and you don’t want to fake being happy. But at the same time, you don’t know exactly what is wrong either. there isn’t a way to explain it to someone who doesn’t already understand. if you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. people have stopped being comforting.. and being alone never was. at least when you’re alone no one constantly asks you what is wrong and there isn’t anyone who wont take ‘I don’t know’ for an answer. you feel the way you do just BECAUSE. you hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait.

Metallica › Fade To Black

Life it seems, will fade away
Drifting further every day
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters no one else
I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free

Things are not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me
Deathly lost, this cant be real
Cannot stand this hell I feel
Emptiness is filling me
To the point of agony
Growing darkness taking dawn
I was me, but now hes gone

No one but me can save myself, but its too late
Now I cant think, think why I should even try

Yesterday seems as though it never existed
Death greets me warm, now I will just say good-bye

Two… Two… will stay Two

He had just met a number of beautiful women. He had a connection though, a conversation with those mysterious black eyes that finished his sentences, whose sentences he’d finished. A smile that blew him away. As he walked home he found himself having a conversations with another woman that just wasn’t it. The written words that were sent through the waves that traveled through the sweet air, left him awake for hours. He stared up on the ceiling trying to make sense of what was happening. He looked out his window to see if the lights that filled the street every night were let out as the sun started to rise up in the heavenly skies. He wrote them, not knowing what they would make her do. “Why am I trying to comfort her tortured soul? Why do I care? Why did I say that? What did I do?” he asked himself. He lay there on his soft bed that seemed to swallow him deeply into the ground. Exactly where he wanted to be. Afraid to see her again tomorrow and have to face the reaction that his words have stirred up in her head. If only he knew.

Her head was spinning with thoughts that made her wonder how people can just be. She remembered the way he touched her. The way he looked into her eyes tonight. The way she disapproved of his affections. She knew that he was nothing but the simple game that has become so complicated. Something she hasn’t got a clue how to play. Where she starved to hear his heart pound, and touch his hair as he sleeps. How nothing meant anything more than just a mere attraction that may not exist tomorrow. If only he knew that as sweet as his words were, and as much as they made her smile and sleep comfortably; they didn’t make her stay up looking for the moon or the stars. Those words were understood to have been sent along with its hidden impure intentions, that only made her dream of rainbows and butterflies.

So, when they meet again, they may or may not say hello. They may or may not look into each others eyes. They may or may not breath in the same rythmes. Two people that just cannot be. Two people that have refused to be. Two people that will never be. She may find someone else who’s words are more intriguing. He may find another who’s knows how to play his game.

[Heaven Sent]

Sent from heaven.
Sent from heaven.

Now you can wait your whole life wondering
When it’s gonna come or where it’s been.
You may have got your heart broken
A few times in the past
Never last strong as it used to,
Don’t feel as good as it used to (before)
And all the things you used to say,
Things you used to do, went right out the door

Oh no more, will you be the one
That’s what you tell everyone around you
But you know they’ve heard it all before
What more can you say
When love won’t let you, walk away
And you can’t help who you love
And you find yourself giving it away
When you think you’re in love

[CHORUS:]
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)

Now you can wait your whole life tryna change
What the fear from what it’s been
You may have put your whole life into a man
Loving what you thought that could’ve been.
Don’t wanna swing your change
When you don’t feel as good as you used to (before)
And everything you used to say,
Everything you used to do clear right out the door

Oh no more, will you be the one
That’s what you tell everyone around you
But you know they’ve heard it all before
What more can you say
When love won’t let you, walk away
And it can’t help who it loves
And you find yourself giving it away
When you think you’re in love

[CHORUS]
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)

Everybody say
I wanna be the one you love
I wanna be (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one you trust
I wanna be (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one you need
I wanna be (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one
I wanna be the one (sent from heaven)

[CHORUS:]
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)

I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There’s a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you’re sent from (sent from heaven)

It will last forever

“Trust me, it’s paradise.
This is where hungry people come to feed.
For mine is a generation that circles the globe
in search of something we haven’t tried before…
so never refuse an invitation,
never resist the unfamiliar,
never fail to be polite
and never out-stay your welcome.
Just keep your mind open
and suck in the experience…
and if it hurts, you know what?
It’s probably worth it.
You hope and you dream,
but you never believe that something’s going to happen to you…
not like it does in the movies.
And when it actually does,
you expect it to feel different.
More blissful… more real.
I was waiting for it to hit me.
I still believe in paradise…
but now at least i know it’s not some place you can look for.
Because it’s not where you go…
it’s how you feel for a moment in your life…
and if you find that moment?

It will last forever.”

/the beach